PondScumAndLawyers.com: Quotes and One-Liners

Quotes and One-Liners

...brainpower is the scarcest commodity and the only one of real value. — Robert A. Heinlein
A brute kills from pleasure, a fool kills from hate. — Robert A. Heinlein
A committee is a life form with six or more legs and no brain. — Robert A. Heinlein
A competent and self-confident person is incapable of jealousy in anything. Jealousy is invariably a symptom of neurotic insecurity. — Robert A. Heinlein
A human being should be able to change a diaper, plan an invasion, butcher a hog, conn a ship, design a building, write a sonnet, balance accounts, build a wall, set a bone, comfort the dying, take orders, give orders, cooperate, act alone, solve equations, analyze a new problem, pitch manure, program a computer, cook a tasty meal, fight efficiently, die gallantly. Specialization is for insects. — Robert A. Heinlein
A monarch's neck should always have a noose around it -- it keeps him upright. — Robert A. Heinlein
A touchstone to determine the actual worth of an "intellectual"- find out how he feels about astrology. — Robert A. Heinlein
A woman is not property and husbands who think otherwise are living in a dream world. — Robert A. Heinlein
All men are created unequal. — Robert A. Heinlein
An acquantance is someone you know well enough to borrow money off but not well enough to lend it to. — Robert A. Heinlein
An Elephant; a Mouse built to government specifications. — Robert A. Heinlein
Animals can be driven crazy by placing too many in too small a pen. Homosapiens are the only animal that voluntarily does this to themselves. — Robert A. Heinlein
Any government will work if authority and responsibility are equal and coordinate. This does not insure "good" government; it simply insures that it will work. But such governments are rare — most people want to run things but want no part of the blame. — Robert A. Heinlein
Anyone can see a forest fire. Skill lies in sniffing the first smoke. — Robert A. Heinlein
Anyone who cannot cope with mathematics is not fully human. At best he is a tolerable subhuman who has learned to wear shoes, bathe, and not make messes in the house. — Robert A. Heinlein
As the caterpillar chooses the finest leaves to lay her eggs on so the priest lays his curse on the fairest joys. — Robert A. Heinlein
Avoid making irrevocable decisions when tired or hungry. — Robert A. Heinlein
Beauty is not diminished by being shared. — Robert A. Heinlein
Being intelligent is not a felony. But most societies evaluate it as at least a misdemeanor. — Robert A. Heinlein
Being right too soon is socially unacceptable. — Robert A. Heinlein
Belief gets in the way of learning. — Robert A. Heinlein
Cheops Law: Nothing ever gets built on schedule or within budget. — Robert A. Heinlein
Citizenship is an attitude, a state of mind, an emotional conviction that the whole is greater than the part...and that the part should be humbly proud to sacrifice itself that the body may live. — Robert A. Heinlein
Climate is what we expect. Weather is what we get. — Robert A. Heinlein
Delusions are often functional. A mother's opinion about her children's beauty, intelligence, goodness etc. adnauseum keep her from drowning them at birth. — Robert A. Heinlein
Everything to excess. To enjoy the flavour of life take big bites. Moderation is for monks. — Robert A. Heinlein
Formal courtesy between husband and wife is even more important than it is between strangers. — Robert A. Heinlein
Government research is a contradiction in terms. — Robert A. Heinlein
Happiness is wanting what you get, NOT getting what you want. — Robert A. Heinlein
I am free, no matter what rules surround me. If I find them tolerable, I tolerate them; if I find them too obnoxious, I break them. I am free because I know that I alone am morally responsible for everything I do. — Robert A. Heinlein
I came, I saw, she conquered! (The original Latin seems to have been garbled) — Robert A. Heinlein
If "everybody knows" such-and-such, then it ain't so, by at least ten thousand to one. — Robert A. Heinlein
If the universe has any purpose more important than topping a woman you love and making a baby with her hearty help, I've never heard of it. — Robert A. Heinlein
If you happen to be one of the fretful minority who can do creative work, never force an idea; you'll abort it if you do. Be patient and you'll give birth to it when the time is ripe. Learn to wait. — Robert A. Heinlein
If you pray hard enough, water will run uphill. How hard? Why, hard enough to make water run uphill, of course! — Robert A. Heinlein
In a society in which it is a moral offense to be different from your neighbor your only escape is never to let them find out. — Robert A. Heinlein
It is better to copulate than never. — Robert A. Heinlein
It's amazing how much "mature wisdom" resembles being too tired. — Robert A. Heinlein
Little girls, like butterflies, need no excuse. — Robert A. Heinlein
Love is the condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own. — Robert A. Heinlein
Man can be chained, but he cannot be domesticated. — Robert A. Heinlein
Man rarely, if ever, manages to dream up a God superior to themselves. Most Gods have the manners and morals of a spoiled child. — Robert A. Heinlein
Money is a powerful aphrodisiac but flowers work almost as well. — Robert A. Heinlein
Most "scientists" are bottle washers and button sorters. — Robert A. Heinlein
Most people can't think, most of the remainder won't think, the small fraction who do think mostly can't do it very well. The extremely tiny fraction who think regularly, accurately, creatively, and without self-delusion- in the long run these are the only people who count... — Robert A. Heinlein
Never appeal to a mans better nature. He may not have one. Invoking his self interest gives you more leverage. — Robert A. Heinlein
Never do today what you can put off till tomorrow if tomorrow might improve the odds. — Robert A. Heinlein
Never underestimate the power of human stupidity. — Robert A. Heinlein
No intelligent man has any respect for an unjust law. — Robert A. Heinlein
No state has an inherent right to survive through conscript troops and, in the long run, no state ever has. Roman matrons used to say to their sons: "Come back with your shield, or on it." Later on, this custom declined. So did Rome. — Robert A. Heinlein
Nursing does not diminish the beauty of a womans breasts; it enhances their charm by making them look lived in and happy. — Robert A. Heinlein
Obscurity is the refuge of incompetence. — Robert A. Heinlein
One man's "magic" is another man's engineering. "Supernatural" is a null word. — Robert A. Heinlein
Progress is made by lazy men looking for easier ways to do things. — Robert A. Heinlein
Secrecy is the beginning of tyranny. — Robert A. Heinlein
Sex should be friendly; otherwise stick to mechanical toys, it's more sanitary. — Robert A. Heinlein
Sin lies only in hurting other people unnecessarily. All other sins are invented nonsense. (Hurting yourself isn't sinful just stupid.) — Robert A. Heinlein
Taxes are not levied for the benefit of the taxed. — Robert A. Heinlein
The greatest productive force is human selfishness. — Robert A. Heinlein
The hardest part of gaining any new idea is sweeping out the false idea occupying that niche. — Robert A. Heinlein
The human race divides politically into those who want people to be controlled and those who have no such desire. — Robert A. Heinlein
The moral difference between a soldier and a civilian is that the soldier accepts personal responsibility for the safety of the body politic of which he is a member. The civilian does not. — Robert A. Heinlein
The supreme irony of life is that no one gets out of it alive. — Robert A. Heinlein
The three-legged stool of understanding is held up by history, languages, and mathematics. Equipped with these three you can learn anything you want to learn. But if you lack any one of them you are just another ignorant peasant with dung on your boots. — Robert A. Heinlein
The truth of a proposition has nothing to do with its credibility. And vice versa. — Robert A. Heinlein
There is no worse tyranny than to force a man to pay for what he does not want merely because you think it would be good for him. — Robert A. Heinlein
There is only one way to console a widow but remember the risk. — Robert A. Heinlein
Throughout history, poverty is the normal condition of man. Advances which permit this norm to be exceeded- here and there, now and then- are the work of an extremely small minority, frequently despised, often condemned, and almost always opposed by all right-thinking people. Whenever this tiny minority is kept from creating, or (as sometimes happens) is driven out of a society, the people then slip back into abject poverty. This is known as "bad luck." — Robert A. Heinlein
To stay young requires unceasing cultivation of the ability to unlearn old falsehoods. — Robert A. Heinlein
What a wonderful world it is that has women in it. — Robert A. Heinlein
Yield to temptation; it may not pass your way again. — Robert A. Heinlein