Quotes and One-Liners 
"... one of the main causes of the fall of the Roman Empire was that, lacking zero, they had no way to indicate successful termination of their C programs." — Robert Firth

A human being should be able to change a diaper, plan an invasion, butcher a hog, conn a ship, design a building, write a sonnet, balance accounts, build a wall, set a bone, comfort the dying, take orders, give orders, cooperate, act alone, solve equations, analyze a new problem, pitch manure, program a computer, cook a tasty meal, fight efficiently, die gallantly. Specialization is for insects. — Robert A. Heinlein

At Group L, Stoffel oversees six first-rate programmers, a managerial challenge roughly comparable to herding cats. — The Washington Post Magazine, June 9, 1985

I wrote a program in Lisp once...it wrote back to me.

It's hard to make a program foolproof because fools are so ingenious.

Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning. — Rich Cook.

The crimes we are about to depict have been specially committed for this program.

The most important thing in the programming language is the name. A language will not succeed without a good name. I have recently invented a very good name and now I am looking for a suitable language. — D. E. Knuth, 1967

The only thing more dangerous than a hardware guy with a code patch is a programmer with a soldering iron. — Unknown

The primary purpose of the Data statement is to give names to constants; instead of referring to pi as 3.141592653589793 at every appearance, the variable Pi can be given that value with a Data statement and used instead of the longer form of the constant. This also simplifies modifying the program, should the value of pi change. —Fortran manual for Xerox Computers

Wayne's World C Programming Style Guide: A == B; !;

When people can program computers in English, management will learn most people don't know English. — Eric Guerrino

Why do programmers get Halloween and Christmas mixed up?
Because OCT(31) = DEC(25)

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